Many people fail to understand the strange soul that is Jack J.P. Rutman. As a result of all my quixotic eccentricity, I tend to stand apart from peers my same age. Perhaps one of the strangest aspects of my existence is my study of the Japanese language. Many people who meet me wonder, “Why is this weird white kid learning Japanese???,” an excellently articulated question. This blogpost helps explain the rationale behind my decisions. Hopefully with a little examination, my story can offer valuable insight to you, dear reader.

My story begins during my sophomore year of college at the University of Delaware.  After flirting with the study of Spanish for many years, I eventually fell in love with learning Japanese. Hidden within the Japanese language are a multitude of stereotypical perceptions that we foreigners use to characterize the Japanese people. From our perspective, the Japanese grammar structure is both simple and complex, riddled with polite honorifics from a long-past feudal society. By speaking the Japanese language, one can feel the polite and endlessly hardworking attitudes held by the Japanese people. Take for instance the phrase 失礼します, or shitsurei shimasu. I was instructed to use this phrase before beginning oral Japanese examinations with my instructors. Quite literally it means, “I’m sorry for what I am about to do”. What an excellent way to begin an assessment! Nonetheless, this phrase can give you a window into the incredibly complex forms of polite speech that is required by the Japanese language. 

It is in this complexity that I found an outlet for my ambitions. Throughout my entire life I have been incurably lazy and unmotivated. While my peers would always maintain that I displayed unique creativity and intelligence, I only ever used my inherent qualities to achieve the bare minimum in life. My toxic rationale was that I never needed to push myself to improve my future or my attitude. By virtue of born privilege and circumstance alone, I believed I was already ahead of so many others. Not only is this assessment of life cruel and disheartening; it can sap all of the potential from an impressionable young person. The view takes for granted the years of pain and sacrifice it took to put me on this planet. Indeed, untold human suffering was required to provide modern man with the shared luxury certain humans now enjoy. It took me 18 years of life to cast aside this horrible outlook and realize that I could not continue to filch off of the success of my forebears. I realized that I could no longer continue to live an easy life through coasting alone. I would need to transform myself in order to achieve everything I knew I was capable of accomplishing: to achieve everything I wanted to accomplish.

While some people believe that nothing is owed of them, I believe that I owe the world everything. I take nothing for granted and am grateful for every day I get to spend on this earth. It is a beautiful fact that every day presents a unique opportunity to achieve something new. I have chosen to use these opportunities to try and better myself in order to give back to my fellow man. I want to use my one life to improve the station of others and to leave this world better than when I entered it. While this may seem like a daunting task, I believe that by creating an impact on even one other life, I will have made a difference. The question then becomes, “What is the best way to help others?” I firmly believe that people will only excel in vocations that interest them. A baker would make for a terrible construction worker, while a carpenter would probably be a lousy chef. After coming to terms with this fact, I decided to pursue my true passion: Foreign Relations. While I knew the chances of great fame and fortune being a part of my life were slim to none, I believed that through virtue of hard work and determination, I could create a long and rewarding career. This is where Japanese began to enter my days. 

Once I chose my path of study, I decided to enroll in a Japanese class on a whim. It seemed appropriate to me given my Asian foreign policy concentration. Although not required by my degree, I figured I could always drop the course if it proved too difficult. Looking back I laugh at it, but beginner Japanese was the most difficult course I had taken up to that point. Before my sophomore year of college, my undemanding liberal arts degree had required very little of me outside of a STEM course here and there. I had never been forced to make sacrifices in my education; never forced to prioritize study over play. To succeed in studying Japanese, every part of my being was required. As a result, a very interesting change began to happen: I loved it. I began to pour everything I had into my academics. Friends would poke fun at me for my devotion to schoolwork, but it was too late. I was addicted. My hard work has paid off, as since the day I enrolled in my first Japanese class, I have not received a grade less than a B+ (and that B+ continues to haunt me).

In Japanese, I found an outlet for my desire to achieve. Each day brings a small amount of satisfying improvement. I go to bed pleased that every night, I knew more than the day before. I get the pleasure of knowing that, should I continue on my path, I have untold opportunity and experiences awaiting me in a foreign land. Even if said opportunities don’t come to fruition, I know that I will still be better off than I was before. That is why I have created this blog. That is why I am sharing my experiences with you. I believe that by working towards my goal, I will be able to make an impact on our world. I believe I will be able to make my life mean something. Even if success does not await me at the end of the tunnel, I can make peace with the fact that I gave it my all. No matter what is said about me once I’m gone, no one will be able to say I didn’t try. 

Therefore, I hope that you will join me on this journey. While the road may be long and winding, I pray that it will prove successful. By sharing and collaborating with one another, we will be able to elevate our station in life. Our ability to exchange information will empower us to achieve endless accomplishments. It will enable us to become more. Thank you for taking the time to read this, and may you go on to be all that you can. 

さよなら、私の友達。